The Pope and Condoms

A historical moment in the history of sex and protection:

Pope Benedict XVI announced that condom use, which has been long condemned by the Catholic Church, is permitted for male prostitutes seeking to stop the spread of HIV.

But as modern as this seems there is of course a catch - as usual. According to their rules it is okay for male prostitutes to wear one - so what about the rest of the world, people with a heterosexual tendency who are using condoms to prevent any sexually transmitted disease or getting the partner pregnant - are we worth less because we are thoughtful and responsible?




"At the same time, the pope considered an exceptional situation in which the exercise of sexuality represents a real risk to the lives of others. In this case, the pope does not morally justify the exercise of disordered sexuality, but believes that the use of condoms to reduce the risk of infection is a 'first step on the road to a more human sexuality', rather than not to use it and risking the lives of others."

The next step would be Pope Benedikt demonstrating the correct use of it.

Halleluja!

And by the way: carrying a condom does NOT mean you are a sex-manic/slut, using every opportunity that comes along, it just means that you are a very responsible person.

Wrong - wronger - Gorleben!

A train hauling an astonishing 123 tons of nuclear waste material arrived today in the northern German city of Gorleben - after months of heavy protests and the usual violent clashes with the police.





Germany has stored radioactive waste in Gorleben for three decades. And for three decades, protesters have tried to block transport of that waste, blowing whistles and chaining themselves to railroad tracks. However, this year’s resistance was the largest seen in the history of Gorleben protest, even participated by politicians.

The difference between last century's and today's protest is of course that more people have access to the internet and hence the word can be spread wider and faster - which probably explains the high number in activists.

Even sheep seemed to be interested this year :))...

Chancellor Angela Merkel still believes nuclear plants are necessary to preserve access to cheap energy as part of a comprehensive energy policy that included developing renewable resources. Well I guess if she says so it must be true. Why use the wind, the sun or the waves if we can have nuclear power!

Claudia Roth, the Green Party co-chairwoman, joined protestors on Saturday to block a road.

The train hauling 11 containers of radioactive waste rolled through Germany on Saturday on its 621 mile journey from Valognes, France. Though the events were mostly peaceful, television news reports showed some clashes, with the police beating back protesters with batons, tear gas and water cannons, while demonstrators attacked officers and at one point tried to light a police vehicle on fire.

20.000 police officers were mobilized to ensure that the waste material reaches its destination.

But it was the Saturday protests, not the violence, that demonstrated how deep the opposition went. Tens of thousands of protesters descended on Dannenberg where they displayed flags with the slogan, "Atomkraft - nein danke." (“Nuclear Power — No, Thanks.”)

Good bye Loki

One of the longest and most beautiful lovestories came to an end last night: Helmut Schmidt's beloved wife Loki passed away at the age of 91.

Loki was more than just a politician's wife. A warm, gentle, genuinely kind-hearted woman who has never been into politics but without whom politics would have taken a different turn.

What ended was one of the most beautiful love stories in the history of love and politics of our time that lasted three generations. Loki and Helmut would have been married 70 years in June 2010 - sadly this was not meant to me.

They first met when they were eating cherries together. "In the beginning we were friends.", Helmut once said. "Friends who could rely on each other." That friendship became love.

Who can imagine the pain Helmut must be going through right now. If two lives can meld in a way theirs did, death is not salvation but a neverending pain for the surviving person and it wouldn't surprise me if Helmut followed her before the end of this year.

Best ways to leave this Earthly plane....

Noone lives forever. Death is a fact. Each and everyone will leave this Earthly plane - some sooner, some later, some peacefully, others violently, some voluntarily, many by force.
And then of course there are the ones who haven't realized yet that their corpora has passed the best before date.

Most of Earth's population hope to pass away in their sleep or being surrounded by their family and loved ones - however, statistically binge-drinking deaths have increased in recent years (if you want to trust the UK National Statistics, that is) and the most common cause of death is the silent heart attack (note the facial expression on the woman in this picture: if you will ever experience someone having a heart attack you might be surprised to learn that this is NOT what it will look like!!!)

What about weird deaths? Bookshelfs can cause it, giant umbrellas, belly slams and even garbage.

The latest victim of such a freak accident is Mike Edwards, an early member of British rock group ELO. Police believe a 600kg bale of hay fell from a tractor and crushed his vehicle (and him).



He died instantly.

An egg is an egg and a boiled egg is now at your convenience

An egg is an egg and what would a proper Full English be without it? A half English? A full-on carbo English?

According to a health website they are one of the healthiest foods in the world. However, many people - including some of my vegetarian friends - find them utterly disgusting. As for myself I can't say I have ever been a keen consumer (there is something quite disturbing about it, I admit), but I used to buy them for cakes before I turned all healthy and meat-free. Of course I always used freerange ones. It's since been a long time that I consumed an egg/mayo sandwich and I have managed to completely ban them from my diet, along with milk.

In my ever ongoing quest of British bizarreness I recently blundered into on of Brighton's supermarkets only to discover that they sell boiled eggs (pack of two) for an astonishing 69 pence.


Those of you out there who read my blog regularly (and don't leave comments - I know who you are!) know that I have been mucking about the British obsession with convenience food in one of my last entries. The boiled egg version is just another example. Who will buy those eggs? Who's going to purchase pre-sliced apples? The lazy? The busy? If you have the answer, let me know.

Georgieboy Doubleyou Boosh - in memory of 9/11

Who is the leader of China

What on Earth is that?

Sometimes it takes more than one quick look to figure out what's on a picture.

See the following. Did you identify it straight away? What was your initial thought when you stared at the red little something, clearly the focus of attention?



Now have a look again. Yes, it' s an ostrich! And what an angry one it is!

Bad things happen when birds are being molested...

But thanks to the Police there is no clear and present danger because...

Non-stick power with Pam´s flour

Bakeware can sometimes be a pain in the butt.

Imagine you want to bake a traditional Guglhupf.

Your tin needs to be greased and breadcrumbed in order to prevent the dough from sticking.

But since noone has time nowadays - not even the most bored Hausfrau - chances are high you are stressed and miss some nooks and corners.

Imagine the result: The cake looks fine at first glance, but when you release it from its prison-tin some parts don´t make it - leaving your cake with ugly holes and you at the verge of a nervous breakdown.

What a disaster!

What embarrassment!

You might have swopped to teflon-coated after that experience, but after having heard about the latest Teflon-scare you threw them all in the bin.

Well, thanks to PAM there is no need to worry anymore.

PAM is the knight in shining armour!
Pam in a can provides you with no-stick where you need it most. From now on there are only two things to do with your tin: Spray it & fill it!


PAM eliminates the (utterly time-consuming) two-step process and mess of greasing and flouring pans!

But that´s not all:
Spray your pan with PAM when cooking chicken breasts, pork chops, fish, and more. PAM prevents food from sticking to the pan while providing crispness, browning, and flavor.

And for those who don´t bake and rather bake or broil or grill - PAM will never let you down.

Only the washing up is still the job you might have to do yourself...

The importance of CCTV

My goodness, aren´t we glad to have CCTV cameras in Britannia!
Just imagine a world without CCTV: knifers couldn´t be caught, sex-offenders would still roam the streets unpunished, thieves would rob every single jewellery shop on this Island and your neighbour´s Felis catus would probably end up in the bin.

Wait a second...the cat would end up in the bin? Who would dump a cat in a bin?



Well, apparently there are people out there, so-called "cat-disposers". who actually do bin of our quadrupedal friends. How come? Are they being mind-controlled? Are they animal-haters? Or are they being paid by the government to justify constant surveillance?

You decide!

Miouw.

Lasagne or Sandwich? Why not have both in one?

Italy is famous for its culinary qualities. Pasta, Pizza, Tiramisu, Prosciutto – there is hardly anything that Italy doesn´t have to offer and only gourmands will restrain from endulging themselves in Italian goodies.

Britannia is just as famous for its cuisine extravaganza – unfortunately in the opposite direction. That´s why Italian Chefs will go to Heaven and Britain´s will go to Hell. Or, to be more fair – they had a small chance going to Heaven (thanks to innovative chefs such as Jamie Oliver and Gordon Ramsay ), but a big supermarket chain has managed to digg their own grave.

Blame it on Tesco, one of Britain´s leading supermarket chains. They now offer a so-called Lasagne Sandwich. Yes, you heard right, there is no mistake in the spelling.

One has to say, it is definitely handy for those who cannot make up their mind – whether to have a proper warm meal or just a sandwich that is. So why not just have 2-in-1?

If there is anyone out there who actually volunteers to try this muck – please help yourself and report back to me.

Bon appétit!

Ouch!!! Park Bench w/Steel Spikes

In Yantai Park in eastern China, a park bench has been fitted with steel spikes on a coin-operated timer, as a way to discourage people from sitting on the bench too long. If they don't feed the meter, spikes shoot through the seat causing discomfort but not damage. Parks in China are overcrowded on weekends, and officials believe this will encourage visitors to share the facilities.

Park bosses got the idea from an art installation in Germany where sculptor Fabian Brunsing created a similar bench as a protest against the commercialisation of modern life.

"He thought he was exaggerating. He didn't foresee that a very practical country like China might actually use them for real," said one critic.

Parks in China suffer from chronic overcrowding at weekends when millions of people try to escape the country's teeming cities.

"We have to make sure the facilities are shared out evenly and this seems like a fair way to stop people grabbing a bench at dawn and staying there all day," said one park official.

Hans Söllner

Bavarian sing-songwriter Hans Söllner is notorious for his political rebelliousness and well-known for his reggae-inflected folk music style. His popularity is arguably greater in Austria than in his native Germany, where his public image is tarnished in the eyes of the government. Söllner's wide-ranging and sometimes heavy-handed political criticism, not to mention his public embrace of marijuana, made him the subject of increasingly costly fines, to such a degree that he views himself as the victim of state-sponsored repression.

Musically, Söllner is first and foremost a live performer -- many of his albums are in fact live recordings -- and this is a major aspect of his appeal, for he prefers to tour and perform live in-person rather than work with a major label and communicate with his audience via studio-recorded albums. In later years, he toured frequently with the Austrian reggae band Bayaman'Sissdem.




He has recently given an interview wich you can read here.

What the gentlemen couldn´t achieve the ladies did

Well done to the under 20´s football team Germany for having won the World cup!!

Congratulations!

Your country (and I) are proud of you :)



Frauenpower!

Bavaria and ze smokers - and smoking in general

Are you a smoker? Do you enjoy your occasional fag once in a while? How about when you are going out. e. g. having a meal in a restaurant? Or the world-famous Oktoberfest? Isn´t it nice to chat with your mates while having a cigarette in one of the huge beer tents together with a Mass? Are you looking forward to this year´s beer festival?

If you are, and if you are a smoker, you´re in for the high jump and it´s probably better not to go to Munich for this year´s big event. Bavaria has become a non-smoking state where smoking is banned in all public houses, restaurants and even in the above mentioned beer tents.




Being German and having lived in my old Heimat for quite a while I know what this is coming to eventually: Smoking, once considered cool and hip (until not long ago) will be the new society´s scapegoat. Meaning you will be an outsider if you smoke. An outcast. A declassified, extruded piece of human flesh whose only crime is to have a cigarette.

Take my mum for example: In the 70s she used to smoke like a chimney. Smoking was cool, groovy, everyone was seen everywhere with a cigarette. It was almost obligatory and considered weird to actually not having a Glimmstengel between your lips. Then my mum became pregnant with me (thank you) and gave it up. Just like that. Which is not a bad thing. What is bad though is that she turned from heavy chainsmoker to devoted smoker-hater which basically means she has zero tolerance for smokers. And I mean ZERO. Null, Nada, Niente, Niets, Ingenting! Even if someone is waiting at the pedestrian traffic light enjoying a fag under the blue sky she will shake her hands vigorously, trying to push the smoke away and pretending to suffocate from it, accompanying the whole scenario by loud, fake coughing noises.

I used to smoke when I was a teenager (don´t pretend you are shocked, you knew it, mum!) but I have never really been a heavy smoker. I could go without fags for months and I usually just smoked when I drank alcohol. They call it "social smoker" I just started to smoke more regularily last winter and yes, I do enjoy my cigarette(s) on weekends or even during the week when I feel like it.

Even during my smoke-free years I supported smokers. Why? Because - let´s be honest - at the end of the day it´s not really about smoking. It´s not really about your health or about pollution - it is about FREEDOM and how it is being taken away from us, little by little, bit by bit. It is about your freedom to have a cigarette - whenever you want, wherever you want, how many you want.

"But I want to have my freedom to enjoy fresh air when I want and not let it be tainted by smokers." I hear you crying.

Well, you don´t have to put up with it. Most places are smoke-free anyway. And if you happen to stand next to a smoker at the traffic light, under the blue sky, step aside for fuck´s sake. It´s easy. You would do it if someone sat opposite of you, caughing. And you wouldn´t complain about them bloody caughers, would you!

How about banning alcohol for a change? Or sweets? Smoking kills? Well, I pledge for labelling sugar-containing products Eating sugar causes tooth decay. And by law anything that contains even a tiny percentage of alcohol should be marked with Alcohol destroys brain cells.

"Yeah but that´s not the same." You complain.

It IS exactly the same, you just don´t see it. It is about choice. Your choice to have a cigarette/sweet/alcohol and not having someone decide it for you. You believe the decision was taken by the Volk? That might be true, but the mind of the Volk is of course manipulated.

Decide for yourself.

And wake up.

And have a fag :p

And this is how it´s not done :(

It´s over for dreamteam Germany. They lost 0 - 1 to Spain.




What happened tonight to team Germany is unclear to me and probably to 82 Million Germans. Many say it was Müller´s absence that caused the team not to perform like they did before. I think it was the insurmountable Spanish wall combined with a poor performance and showing too much respect for team Spain.

But whatever the reason, it won´t matter. Fact is it´s over and out, and the next World champion will be either Spain or Holland.




Thank you to all those who have been supporting team Germany over the last four weeks!

And thank you team Germany for the beautiful football you played. You are Sieger unserer Herzen!

German Streetnames renamed for the WorldCup

Sit back and enjoy :)

Nothing´s gonna stop us now!

They humiliated the Brits, they slaughtered the Argentinians - the winning story of the incredible, unstoppable dreamteam Germany continues....






Go get the cup! You can do it!

Drama in Ghana!

What a drama it was! What a disappointment for Ghana! It would have been nice to see at least one African team in the World Cup´s Semi-Final - after all it´s held in South Africa. But it was not meant to be. They fought hard, but the penalties broke their necks. Or was it the missed penalty in the last minute of the additional time...? Whatever it was, it´s over for Ghana, Uruguay has won - I am truly and utterly sorry. Maybe next time...




And here´s how fate took its hand:

1-0 Uruguay: Diego Forlan, who scored the Celeste's goal in regulation, puts a hard right-footed shot into the right corner of the net.

1-1 Ghana: Asamoah Gyan, who missed a penalty kick by hitting the crossbar on the final play of extra time, sends a right-footed drive high into the right corner.

2-1 Uruguay: Mauricio Victorino's high shot to the left side of the net goes in even though goalkeeper Richard Kingson guesses correctly and dives to that side.

2-2 Ghana: Fernando Muslera also guesses correctly, but fails to stop Stephen Appiah's right-footed shot to the left side.

3-2 Uruguay: Andres Scotti sends his shot down the middle, and Kingson barely misses getting his foot on it despite diving the wrong way.

3-2 Ghana: Muslera dives right and John Mensah's low kick goes right into him.

3-2 Uruguay: Maximiliano Pereira hits his drive far over the net.

3-2 Ghana: Dominic Adiyiah sends a low shot to the right, where Muslera has dived, and he makes another easy save.

4-2 Uruguay: Sebastian Abreu sends the Celeste into the semifinals for the first time in 40 years with a soft chip high down the middle as Kingson dives right.

And this is how it´s done!

The lion has been defeated! It´s over. Germany has beaten England 4-1 in a thrilling match. And it was 1966 again! Ball hit the bar, ball fell to the ground - only this time clearly behind that line and not on or in front back then. So technically the final score should be 4-2. It was a beautiful match, England´s performance was poor, its defence non-existent, Germans player did very well, but at the end there can only be one winner.


After the match I walked to the seafront, naturally wearing my Deutschland T-Shirt. A man with a very strong Australian accent approached me:

"How did it go for Germany?" he asked.

"Pretty well." I replied. "We won 4-1. Well, it should have really been 4-2 but anyway, Germany won."

"Should you rather not be wearing this T-Shirt then? Are you not afraid?" he asked.

"I am not afraid." I replied. "And to be honest, being a woman helps as well."

We said our goodbyes, I, sat down on the beach with my friend (England supporter) and we had a few beers. When I walked back home a mischievous looking man raised his voice, pretending to talk to someone: "We´ve lost against the fucking Germans AGAIN." He said. His son (who must have been not older than 5) echoed: "Yeah but we won the fucking World War!" For a split second I thought of asking the small boy when World War II actually occured. But I left it. I did not want to spoil my good mood.



Take a look at this video I found on YouTube: Merkel and Cameron sitting together watching the match. And because YouTube has always comments that make one´s day, here are my top 5:


5. england is not an island you stoopid git! (by Strathpipe)

4. @WorldsFinest20 lol "You won this match, but remember, we beat you in the war!" This sounds like a broken record, and it's getting old. Take a look at your calendar and realize, we're in the year 2010 now. I know it's hard to understand for guys like you, but the enemy doesn't exist anymore. Just take that broom out of your ass and get real. :) (by Lintflas)

3. ze english played bezzer zen we expected (by Klausdiehart)

2. yeah Angela Merkel you can smile & laugh you bitch, i hope argentina beat you next round, then who will be laughing. that lampard goal was way over the line, you cheating scum, always have, always will be, oh yeah 5-1 back in 2002 wasn't it, didn't beat the record. oh yeah Angela you are forgetting one important thing that happened in the past, we actually beat the crap out of your country in the second world war, put that on your pipe & smoke it. (By Worldsfinest20)

1. I would like to say on behalf of all reasonable English people: Sorry for all the ignorant comments left for this video. Germany is a great nation and have a wonderful footballing history which we English would love to have. Many ignorant English people like to bring up the war in order to score points over Germans. This is pathetic, stupid and displays a lack of understanding of the circumstances of that most terrible period in history. (by Jonboy20)

Should I stay or should I go?

To the pub that is. This Sunday. THE Sunday of all Sundays. It´s World Cup 2010, it´s England vs Germany. The tension is rising, the pressure is on - the English are prepared ("Bring on the Germa(i)ns") - who in return train eagerly for THE match of all matches.
The story with England vs Germany is the following: it doesn´t matter if England wins the World Cup. It doesn´t even matter if Germany wins the World Cup. Even if England doesn´t win the World Cup it´s okay - as long as they beat ze Germans.


Why? Coz it´s them Germans, innit! It´s 1966 again, it´s World War II, Blitzkrieg, Dunkirk, Heil the Führer, bring it on! Let us have a look at some of the tabloids, purely for entertainment purpose:

The Sun: "Bring On The Germains"
The Sun also asks its readers: "Can England beat Germany?" - Surprisingly 72% (!) don´t think so, 16% do indeed, 6% say it depends if they practice penalties (good point actually!) and merely 4% simply don´t know. Or don´t care. If you ask me, yes, I think England can indeed beat Germany. The German team is unbeatable when it comes to penalties (that´s a fact - let´s face it!) but they are not in good shape and the absence of Ballack does show.

The Daily Telegraph: "England burnt out and stupid to be facing Germany now, says Franz Beckenbauer"

Beckenbauer claims that a game like this should be a semi-final and not a last 16. Well Mr. Beckenbauer, with all do respect, it doesn´t work that way I´m afraid. What should be and/or should not be is not up to the people who run football but to the lottery. Who´s the stupid here? You are. Please leave the maths to mathematicians, football to footballers and the World will be a much safer place.


The Guardian: "England buzzing ahead of Germany match"

"The lads are buzzing – it was a great performance, not just winning the game but a great performance from front to back," Defoe said. "The spirit's great and we're looking forward to it.
A great performance? When? Where? In this Universe? Or in a parallel Universe? The match I watched against Slovenia was anything but a good performance. Rooney wasn´t great, the first half had a hint of excitement but the second half was so boring that people paid so little attention and didn´t even know why the second goal was not a goal (it was offside, fyi). Seriously, take a look at Argentina, THAT is how football shold be played. I wish Slovenia had scored, that would have brought some more tension. Playing safe is boring!

I don´t know why England thinks they cannot beat Germany. Of the 27 games played against Germany, England have won 12 (7 of them up to 1966), while Germany have won 10, and also won both penalty shootouts that followed two of the five draws. That should not give Team England a reason to worry or to be afraid.

Anyway, let´s see how it goes on Sunday. I will probably be watching it in my house, maybe with my flatmate, maybe on my own, waving my small German flag (my landlord suggested I´d rather not hang the oversized one outside). I hope my team will win, but I hope the fight will be a good one. A fair one. With lots of beer, lots of popcorn, lots of free kicks, lots of corners, lots of excitement, lots of tension and lots of goals. Because it is, after all, a football game. And sometimes it´s more about watching a really good match than winning itself.

May the best team win.

Creator and the Church

Art is my friend who used to smoke and drink a lot and then decided to give it up because he didn´t see the point in it anymore.

He must be in his 50s though I guess he is younger than he looks because he had a rough life. His statue is slim and his face covered in millions of wrinkles with an unshaven beard and sunken cheeks. His eyes are intense light blue and kind. He does not live in the streets but he spends his days on the beach. He is familiar with a lot of so-called “characters” in Brighton and we meet from time to time just to talk about life. I am always looking forward to those talks because I know they will be uplifting and insightful.

Usually I meet him after work and we sit together on the beach to watch the sunset.
It´s nice to talk about other things than the weather and have some talks on different issues. It always amazes me how much there is still to learn.


Yesterday we spoke about existence. Where do we come from´? Where are we going? What´s it all about?

His theory is that there is no such thing/being called creator. Everything that is has always been and always will be. There is no creator that made humans and animals and plants. In the beginning there were Neutrons, Electrons and Protons. Which leads to the question: Where did these come from? Even Scientists believe they came out of nowhere. Art says that it is because of our limited understanding of everything and our obsession to explain everything we feel uncomfortable with the thought that everything just is.

I find this theory very interesting. It is true, our mind needs to analyze everything. It needs to explain, to look for answers and who knows maybe it is after all just the mind that keeps us from finding the truth. I am not different. I want to find anwers too. But I can´t accept that there is one being who is responsible for everything.

Maybe we have to stop overthinking. Maybe we should just accept the fact that some things are unexplainable.

Today I am going to see my friend Y. She is a Christian. In her world God has created everything and God can and will destroy everything when He is angry. In the twinkling of an eye. Just like that. Therefore we must obey the 10 commandments and not do any wrong according to His understanding of right and wrong.

I accept her religious views as much as I accept and tolerate everyone else´s, whatever their belief.

The latest sex abuse scandals though show that not everything and everyone is as holy as they pretend to be.




As if child abuse wasn´t one of the worst crimes already, this happening in a place where people go to seek answers to their questions and look for comfort in times of despair is probably beyond people´s understanding. My mum told me last week that she had to sit on the vicar´s lap when she was small and confessed her sins. That is pretty disturbing...And that happened 60 years ago so I guess abuse has been going on for centuries. What makes me suspicious though is why these reports are coming out now when this has been going on for decades. I suspect there is something much bigger going on here. What it is I don´t know but it just doesn´t smell right.

The Vulcanic Ash Advisory Centre (VAAC)...

...is an institution most Brits have probably not even heard of until last week. A flood warning center, fair enough. Even a tornado forecaster. But why on earth do we need the VAAC when there are no active volcanoes on this Island?

Well, the answer lies 1.809 kilometere (that´s 1.124.06 miles for anti-metrics) further north-west: Iceland. An evil island. It has everything you don´t want in your back garden. Glaciers, geyseres, powerfull waterfalls and over two dozen active (!) volcanoes.
Unsurprisingly one of those volcanoes wants to erupt from time to time.

This might be good news for Icelanders (a treat for the eye) but unfortunately it is not so good news for most Europeans and especially not for Britains. It basically means that noone is coming noone is going. And that´s not all. The newspapers are full of volcano-related stories. What a welcome change to the usual rubbish we have to put up with every day.

Trapped for two weeks is a good one, Fresh goods for supermarkets rot in Kenya as volcano grounds flights sounds unbelievable but it is true and the number one tabloid in the UK even talks about total diseruption! It can´t get much better than this.

But then, if it´s so dangerous, why does Britannia not lay in ashes? Why is the sun shining and why is the sky blue when it should be dark?

Alun Phillips asks: If this Volcanic ash cloud is covering northern england , why can't I see it? What is going on that they don't want anyone leaving or entering the UK between 12.00 to 18.00 (very convenient timings for a cloud)?




Apparently it is too high up in the sky to see. Which would explain why planes can´t fly.

Well, it would be nice to be able to see it but at the same time it would probably not be very healthy to breath it in.

So let´s enjoy it from a safe distance and have a cup of tea and a biscuit.

Rule China Rule !

Today I went to the Chinese Herbal center. I have been planning to go there for a very long time (2 years) but kept on putting it off. Today was the day! Actually yesterday (Saturday) but I had my first appointment today.

Why did I go there and what did I want from them? Well, I was wondering if they could give me some herbal remedies for poor blood circulation. I´m always cold and it´s not fun to be always cold. I have had some pretty bad experiences with the NHS doctors in the past so I figured it´s maybe better to invest some money in something that looks deeper into the cause and not just treating the symptoms, as Western medicine does.

There were two people at the Center: Doctor Zu and his assistent (who was also interpreter) Chan.

The interpreter translated Doctor Zu´s questions which I truthfully answered. Then he checked my pulse and my tongue which, I was told, is normal in Chinese medicine.

Turns out my Ying and Yang are not in harmony and the Zang-fu (Zhi) are causing the problems that I have.

"Aha..."

In plain English: my kidneys are blocking the flow of my fluids and are causing the problems. Oh yes, and my body is highly toxicated! Which is probably not surprising considering the gallons of alcohol I have consumed over the last 2 weeks or so. But then I ate healthy and I thought that would equilibrate it somehow...

Who would have thought!

Anyway, there is help at hand. Chinese medicine is very old and I do believe in its powers.

Everything that mother Earth has provided for us exists for a reason. Nature doesn´t play dice. Everything is carefully planned and why should pharmaceutical pills be better than natural remedies?
The treatment will last for 3 months (!). It includes accupuncture, massages, fire cupping, detoxication and a strict non-meat, non-sweet, non-alcohol, non-cigarettes, non-fried food and non-nuts diet. Just what I need now the weather gets finally warmer!

Accupuncture is pretty straightforward. They sterilize the specific areas (in my case hands, head, legs, arms and feet) and stick needles into your body. It sounds more painful than it actually is. It doesn´t hurt at all, just gives a twitch in the leg, especially in places where the skin is very thin.



After all the needles are carefully placed you can relax (it´s easy - just don´t think of the needles!). This relaxation lasts for about half an hour. It can be boring but I was lucky enough to listen to some Chinese music being played in the background - that kind of music you hear in Chinese restaurants. Needless to say my stomach started to rumble after a while. Unfortunately my bag with the emergency rations was out of reach and I didn´t dare to move. Doctor Zu was kind enough to leave the heating on though. He even placed a warm lamp over my legs so I wouldn´t get cold. That was very thoughtful because 30 Minutes can quickly turn into eternity when you are cold...

When I was just about to fall asleep Doctor Zu came back and removed all the needles. I thought that would be it and wanted to say my goodbyes, but more was to come...

Massage! A wonderful Tuina massage with peppermint oil. I cannot remember the last time I had a massage but the thought of having a wonderful massage like this once a week for the next 3 months makes me happy beyond belief! He wore some gloves while he was massaging specific areas and he released a lot of tension in my muscles.

After it was over I wanted to say my goodbyes for a second time. Doctor Zu however had other plans. Next on the agenda was fire cupping. Fire cupping involves placing cups containing reduced air pressure (suction) on the skin. It feels weird, as if someone is trying to rip your skin off. It doesn´t hurt though. I ´d say it´s neither pleasant nor unpleasant. It is just weird. The cups stay on your back for 20 minutes or so and are then removed which causes a strange sound and leaves your skin full of red marks.

But that´s just one part of the treatment. Doctor Zu´s assistent prepared a special tea for me - or let´s say the ingredients for it. Tailormade, not to be shared with anyone else. I feel so special :). Noone else is allowed to drink it. I could not identify the ingredients but it looked like a big pile of dried bits and pieces you would normally find in your local forest. Oh yes, there was a bath sponge as well.

Back at home I followed the preparation instructions carefully and am now, while writing this, enjoying my first cup of home-brewed poor bloodcirculation defeater! It looks worse than it actually tastes. It looks like sewage and tastes like a very badly brewed beer.

So, is it worth it? I don´t know, it´s too early to say. It is insanely expensive but considering what I get I don´t think it is too bad. I am just not sure at this point how to survive without Alcohol, cigarettes, chocolate and nuts for so long. I can easily live without meat (maybe after 2 failed attempts of trying to become a vegetarian the meat-free area has finally arrived - 3d time lucky....?) though.

Well, as Nietzsche used to say: was uns nicht umbringt macht uns stärker...

German inventors - Melitta Bentz (E)

I have decided to dedicate some entries to German inventors. After all I am German, that´s my heritage (though it´s partly Belgian too...) and some Germans have invented things that make our life so much easier and deserve to be talked about.

For example, did you know that the washing machine was invented by a German? Or that x-rays were discovered by my ancestors? Those are just 2 in an impressively long list of German inventions.

Though it looks like most famous Germans are men there are some amazing women too who must not be forgotten about. This is why I will dedicate my first entry to a most remarkable woman who plays probably the most important part in my daily life. There is not a day my subconscious doesn´t think of her. It´s a love affair I have had since I first got my hands on it and it is something I can not live without. We are of course talking about...coffee!

Melitta Bentz



Melitta Bentz invented the coffee filter in 1908. As a housewife, Bentz found that percolators were prone to over-brewing the coffee, espresso-type machines at the time tended to leave grounds in the drink, and linen bag filters were tiresome to clean. She experimented with various means, but ended up using blotting paper from the school exercise-book of her son Willi and a brass pot perforated using a nail.

The Kaiserliche Patentamt (Imperial Patent Office) granted her a patent on June 20, 1908, and on December 15, the company was entered into the commercial register with 73 Pfennig as "M. Bentz." After contracting a tinsmith to manufacture the devices, they sold 1,200 coffee filters at the 1909 Leipzig fair.

Her husband Hugo and their sons Horst and Willi were the first employees of the emerging company. In 1910, the company won a gold medal at the International Health Exhibition and a silver medal at the Saxon Innkeepers' Association.

When the Great War erupted, metals were requisitioned for use in zeppelin construction, her husband was conscripted to Romania, paper was rationed, and eventually coffee bean imports were banned, disrupting the normal business. During this time she supported herself by selling cartons.

Continuing expansion caused them to move their business several times in Dresden. By 1927 the demand for the products was so high that the 80 workers had to work in a double-shift system. Because in Dresden no production facilities were found adequate, the fast-growing company moved in 1929 to Minden in the east of Westphalia. By that time 100,000 filters had been produced.

Horst took over the company, now "Bentz & Sohn," in 1930. She transferred the majority stake in Melitta-Werke Aktiengesellschaft to Horst and Willy in 1932, but kept a hand in the business, ensuring that the employees were cared for, offering Christmas bonuses, increasing vacation days from 6 to 15 days per year, and reducing the working week to 5 days. Bentz fostered the company's “Melitta Aid” system, a social fund for company employees.

After the outbreak of World War II, production stopped and the company was ordered to produce goods to aid the war effort. At the conclusion of war, the workers relocated for a time to old factories, barracks, even pubs, because the surviving portions of the main factory had been requisitioned as a provisional administration for the Allied troops, a condition that held for twelve years. By 1948, production of filters and paper had resumed, and at the time of her death at Holzhausen at Porta Westfalica in 1950, the company had reached 4.7 million Deutsche marks.

There is probably no household in Germany which doesn´t use the Melitta Filter. Brits however (still) seem to prefer the so-called cafetiere. Probably because cafetiere sounds better than filter. The problem with the cafetiere is that you have to be really careful when pressing the filter down. If you overfill the press or press the plunger too aggressively, water can splash out and scald you. Not to mention the mess it can cause...

There is even a wikiHow entry dedicted to the proper usage of a cafetiere. In 12 (!) steps it demonstrates what you should or shouldn´t do in order to get a proper cup of coffee. If that´s not complicated enough watch out and pay attention to the Warnings. If you don´t use it properly it can hurt you badly.

Needless to say that this is the last thing one needs first thing in the morning - even before the famous first cup of coffee which gets your braincells going. Isn´t it funny - you need a coffee before you can even figure out how to use the cafetiere but then you have to make the coffee first... :)

Life is so much easier with the sweet Melitta Filter. The Melitta filter doesn´t need any instructions because it´s pretty straightforward and coffee can be made in 3 easy steps:

1. Add paperfilter to plastic filter
2. Place coffee grounds in filter
3. Pour boiling water over it and wait

No need for fancy measurements (cafetiere: 5 tablespoons to 1.4 L - 48 oz or 6 cups - WTF!) - (Melitta: 1 tablespoon per cup on a normal day, 2 when you´ve got a hangover...). Even the cleaning is easy as a pie: just take the paper filter out when you´re done and throw it in the bin. It doesn´t block the sink and both the filter and the coffee grounds are environment friendly (imagine the amount of water you need just to clean the cafetiere). And let´s not forget the money you have to pay for the plumber who has to unblock your sink...

I have spent weeks trying to find the pictured filter in Brighton. Eventually my mum had mercy and sent me one of hers. Actually she sent me 2 in different sizes. The large version is safely stored away in my kitchen and heavily guarded (my flatmate seems to show interest...) - the smaller one is at work so I can have that proper cup of coffee before I start my day in the office.

Most of my colleagues have (until recently) used the cafetiere. There seem to have been some issues with it (needless to say it amused me) and an expensive coffee filter machine was bought. So far so good. The coffee machine was tricky though - adding too much water caused a Monday morning disaster (tiwce!) and slowly but surely people come to realize that Melitta is still the best, the fastest and the easiest to use. So far I have managed to convert 3 of my colleagues to Melittaism. It makes me smile every day I see them using it. The stubborn ones will follow soon...you know who you are!

Thank you Melitta Bentz!

John Street, Brighton, Google Streetview. No comment...

Proporta´s Turbocharger für Autos - einfach genial! (D)

Der Turbocharger von Proporta (Kfz Ausgabe) lädt jetzt sogar das Auto auf!!
Das Teil ist so praktisch und so klein dass es locker ins Handschuhfach passt - und trotzdem so stark dass man damit seine Batterie aufladen kann. Einfach unglaublich.

Für den Preis lohnt es sich wirklich sich den Turbocharger zuzulegen.

Ich möchte auf alle Fälle nie mehr ohne ihn Unterwegs mit dem Auto sein.





Nur € 54.95 bei Proprota!

Mum sent a parcel (E)

Yesterday at work a parcel arrived from my mum. Hooray!!! In it was a book on UFO´s and another book on "mysteriously disappeared persons". Gosh.

Usually she sends me stuff that interests her but not really me. But since she is my mum and I have inherited her genes I guess she assumes that we must share the same taste.

For example, recipes for a Schwarzwälder Kirschtorte. Or supposedly funny jokes she found in magazines. Or a zillion chewing gums (I have not eaten chewing gum in like 10 years...). Or books that I must read because everyone is reading them now and they are so much talked about (eg Maria ihm schmeckt´s nicht).

I don´t like Maria ihm schmeckt´s nicht because it is silly. It is supposed to make you laugh because of the cultural differences (German man and Italian woman fall in love, he´s visiting her family). The demure German guy vs the temperamental Italian family. German correctness vs Italian disorganisation. German Sauerkraut vs Italian Pasta.

It sometimes makes me wonder why books at this level of entertainment are much more promoted rather than literature that stimulate your mind. Actually it does not really make me wonder anymore, it just confirms what I have been suspected for a long time... Baa baa black sheep - throw away your TV!

Anyway, I am reading Helmut Schmidt´s Men and Powers at the moment and I am not even into politics! Helmut Schmidt is one of the most fascinating figures in German history. He did stand for what he believed in and he was not afraid to raise his voice. He had an aggressive and authoritarian way of restraining the young Generation at this time and he did it in a way that hardly anyone has done before and since.




If I had to choose the one German I look up to, it would be him. And noone else.

Thank you Mr Schmidt for keeping my braincells intact!



However, this